For those of you who don’t have a clue what I’m talking about, I discovered that there’s a weasel inside me. But I won the battle and ran 5K nonstop at the Bridge City Boogie in June. Yay me!
So my plan is to continue running throughout the summer – Monday, Wednesday and Friday – and do another 5K run (Run for Your Life, in Martensville) on Sept. 7th and see if I can improve my time.
But like I said, the weasel is back and he’s sneakier than ever. He’s realized that once I get on the treadmill, there’s no tempting me. I’m going to run my planned time and nothing he can say is going to get to me. However, he’s discovered that my real weakness is getting my sorry butt out of bed and on to the treadmill in the first place. The last week of school, it was Dianne 1, Weasel 2. I ran Monday, but slept in Wednesday and Friday. Summer should be easier, as I don’t have to get up at 6 to be able to fit a run in.
The weasel’s not done with me yet, though. On Monday, I was going to run outside for a change, but by the time I got up and ready, it was hot out already. “Oh well,” said Mr. Weasel, “maybe it will be cooler tomorrow. No sense running in this heat.” AND HE ALMOST HAD ME!! But then I realized I could just go downstairs and run on the treadmill. Duh! So this week it’s Dianne 1, Weasel 0 so far. Game on!
Oh, you might be wondering why it’s MR. Weasel. I know it’s a male weasel by the way he tempts me. He sympathizes with me “you look tired, maybe you should sit this one out” and gives me false encouragement “wow, look how well you’ve done, you deserve a break”. If it was a female weasel, I think the temptations would sound more like this – “don’t let society dictate the way you look – you’re fine the way you are” or “you’re just big boned”. Not sure that even makes the slightest bit of sense, but that’s how my brain works. 🙂
This Sunday is the Bridge City Boogie. I’ve signed up to run 5K. I’ve been planning to run 5K since last fall. I trained for awhile. Then something came up. Time went by and I started training again. And something else came up. (Don’t ask what, because truthfully I don’t even remember.) So last week I realized that the Boogie was in 2 weeks. I really want to do this. Time to get serious.
So last Monday I decided I’d try running 1K without stopping – just to see if I could. I’ve been training doing walk/run but wanted to see if I could do1K non-stop. I was smart enough to slow it down and did just fine. (I’m running on our treadmill, so it’s easy to set a pace.) In fact it went so well, I kept on and did 2K. I was pretty proud of myself.
I decided that I’d run Mon Wed and Fri. for the two weeks leading up to the Boogie, and add half a kilometer each day. I even got a bit stupid and tried speeding up some – MISTAKE. But I’ve managed. And I’ve slowed back down.
The weasel showed up last Friday. It shows up when I have half a kilometer to go. It says nice things like “Wow! You’ve done really well! Better than you expected! Good for you.” which is great, but it doesn’t stop there. “You know, you look tired. There’d be no shame in stopping now. You can be proud of what you’ve accomplished. Maybe you should stop now. What’s another half a kilometer going to do? You can make it up next time – when you’re not so tired.” And so it continues for the whole last half a kilometer. It doesn’t matter how far I’m running. It knows I’m weakest – mentally, more than physically – at that last half a kilometer.
So far I’ve been able to resist its siren song with statements (said out loud, of course) like “SHUT UP WEASEL” “BACK OFF WEASEL” “I CAN SO DO THIS WEASEL”. So far so good. Monday morning I ran 3.5K. Tomorrow I’m doing 4K. As long as I don’t weasel out of it.
I have a friend who is a beginning runner like me and she was looking for a virtual running buddy. That sounded just like what I needed! Someone to cheer me on when I’m doing good, to not make excuses for me but to find the positives when I’m down and can’t see them for myself, and someone that I can do the same for.
When I was thinking what to say in my message to her, I automatically started using quotation marks – and not in a good way.
I’m a beginning “runner” – in other words, because I’m slow I shouldn’t really say that I run.
I “try” to run 3 times a week – in other words, because I don’t always succeed, I shouldn’t really count it as trying.
Someone to cheer me on when I’m doing “good” – in other words, because I’m not the fastest or run the longest distance, I shouldn’t really make too much of my little accomplishments.
Yikes. If someone else said that about me, in that way – Dianne’s a “runner” – I’d consider it a slam. So why do I do it to myself? They might just be little marks, but they’re powerful. I’ve decided it’s time to stop using them as belittle marks. Here’s my first attempt:
This morning I ran 2 km non-stop. It took me 18 minutes and 40 seconds. I’m proud of myself. Wednesday I’m going to try 2.5 km. Look out Bridge City Boogie 5km – I’m coming for ya! 🙂