UPDATE: I have received some beautiful letters but not enough of them yet, so I am extending the deadline to May 31, 2020.
In the spring of 2018 my book Dear Me: The Widow Letters was published. It is an anthology of letters written by widows to their newly-widowed selves. I asked them – “If you could send a letter back in time to your newly-widowed self – that heartbroken and overwhelmed woman – what would you say?” Here is the letter that I wrote.
The book was well received by widows and by people who wanted to get a better understanding of what a widow goes through. It was a labour of love for me, and I was so pleased with the comments I received from people saying how much it touched them.
Now I want to publish another book along similar lines to Dear Me: The Widow Letters, but this one will be Dear Me: The Mother Letters.
I am looking for letters from women who have experienced the death of a child. I want to know “If you could send a letter back in time to your newly-bereaved self, what would you say?” Would they be words of comfort? Advice? Hope? Encouragement? Warning? All of the above and more?
If you are a bereaved mother whose loss was at least one year ago, I hope you will consider being a part of this project. Your child may have died before birth, at birth, as a child, as a youth, as an adult – they remain your child regardless of their age.
If your letter is accepted for this anthology, you will receive $50 and a copy of the book. I do not want to limit how much you write, but I am hoping that the letters will be at least 500 words. You can use your full name, your first name and last initial, or remain anonymous if you prefer. If your letter is accepted, I would like to include a picture of your child if possible and a few sentences about when and how he or she died (in general terms – illness, accident, etc.), how old you were when he or she died, and how many years into the past you are reaching.
If you are interested in contributing a letter to this anthology and/or if you have any questions, please contact me at dearme(at)sasktel.net I would like to have all the letters by May 31, 2020.
And if you know of any other women who might be interested in participating, please pass the information along to them. Thank you.
I lost my son Blaine. He was murdered Aug 10, 2017. I ‘d be interested in your project. I miss him so much. He was an adult but the youngest of four. We were very close and I’m still grieving but getting through by the help of a Grief Therapist.
I love your enormous heart, Dianne.
I have tried to contact you via the “dearme@sasktel.net” but it does not work. My son Tommy died in 2008. He was 24 and was misdiagnosed by the hospital. I donated his organs. Through circumstance I was able to find and meet the recipient of his lungs. I also got to meet the recipient’s family. His mother is also a published Saskatchewan author and I have a signed copy of her book of poetry describing her son’s journey with CF and the transplant. Donovan, who received Tommy’s lungs, has been one of the publicized faces on posters advocating for donating organs, etc. here in Saskatchewan. Tommy’s death profoundly and irrevocably changed my life and the rest of his family. I would wish this change on no other parent. I would like to participate in your project by writing about my experiences brought about by the death of my beautiful son. I have no desire for the money if my entry is accepted.
I had lost my daughter 7 years ago and she had a child at the time and was separated. I am planning to write a letter to her.
Dear Dianne,
I am interested in your project, I am a grandmother who lost her precious 11 month old grandson. I would be writing the letter to myself about the grief I have been journeying through having to be a mom to a son whom lost his first child, and as a grandmother who has lost her only grandchild.
I lost my oldest in 2015 June 9th he was my treasure ,I had a scream inside that would not come out,but, I died inside that day, mean while my youngest was battling cancer, my baby, he passed in 2017 October 20th . My insides become empty, the scream came out , there are no words to describe a mother & I am sure a father the empties in the pit of souls. The grieve never ends ,their birthdays, Mother or Father day, holidays Christmas is gone forever. They say “ we have memories “ but their only memories?? Our children our the greatest gift ever given to us in this world , a parent should NEVER HAVE TO BURY THEIR CHILD ?? LET ALONE BOTH . So don’t let anyone tell you, your grieve should be ended, they never lost a child ?? There are no words, to help a parent as we all grieve in different ways . Sadly, we put on a happy face for those still around us but, the pain is deep inside is well hidden ??
I am interested in your project.
I lost my daughter in 2013 and my little boy in 2015.
Both had overcome so much.
Somehow I have survived.
I am interested in taking part in your project!! I lost my only son in August 2018 very violently & tragically!! His life was taken at the hands of apparent friends. I searched for him all night long, no one would give me answers. It was my birthday that day. His death left the Family traumatized, it also shook the entire community.
I just recently stumbled upon your link and am interested in taking part in your project. I am working on it for submission by tomorrow May 31st! My 30 year old son died of an ‘undetermined sudden death’ six years ago. My healing journey has lead me into new directions that I would never have imagined at the time of his death.
[…] to have all the letters by the end of 2019. You can find more information about this project here: http://dianneyoung.ca/2019/01/07/dear-me-the-mother-letters/ […]